Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Why I Hate Dating

I was not a fan of dating before I got married so you can imagine that I am even less of a fan of dating now that I have divorced to add to my status. I never had much luck in the relationship world and being that I am still new to the Austin area, I have found it hard to meet people. So I have been trying the world of online dating via such websites as Match.com, Yahoo Personals, and eHarmony. Granted while I have had some luck in the form of J and James, the majority of my matches have been misses and it has been months since I have had a real connection with any of the guys I have been matched with. I received an email last week that is a prime example of why I hate dating again. Here is that email, word for word, with only personal information removed:

your cute and you sound like a very sweet girl, but please dont take me to a musical, lol . im rob, i work graveyard so i dont wake up till like 3 or 4 in the evenings. and i try to be in bed before the sun rises. hit me up sometime, you can do it here or on my yahoo, the screen name is more political than it sounds , lol. or you could just do it the easy way and call . although i think i do a great job typing, i do this great job with one finger, so i better at least get a friggin hello cause this chit is taking me for ever to type, lol. dont worry , im not one of the weird obsessive guys, i promise i wont be peepin through your windows in the middle of the night, lol. i dont have the time or gas money, lol , im playing ofcorse. at the least we may turn out to at least be friends, later i gotta go to work, you can still call while im working

OK...so now that you are laughing so hard you are crying, I will continue. I really copied and pasted this from the original email. First off, if you can't spell, use capitalization or proper punctuation, don't write me. Second off, if the one thing I mention in my profile that I love is something you hate, don't write me. Third, if you are over the age of 14, please don't use abbreviations such as lol, u, 4, or r. I am not a teenager and this line of conversation does not interest me.

Now let me tell you about Rob. His screen name is Robsnsodeep (lovely!) and his profile picture was him shirtless (no thanks!) Nothing turns me off more than someone whose primary profile picture is them shirtless. I think this is very conceited not to mention the fact that normally the men who choose these pictures have nothing to show off. Rob, however, was showing off the two tattoos right below his collarbones. Being someone with ink, I don't think there is anything wrong with that but I don't necessarily think it is something that should be presented up front. I would not be showing my back tattoo to a man on the first date. And please let's not get started on the grammar.

So if you have any questions as to why I hate dating then please post them here. Otherwise, I do believe this is enough reason for you. While there may be many fish in the sea, the pool has been contaminated and those that remain have serious issues.

7 comments:

Jessica said...

Why did he have to mention that he wouldn't be peeping in your window? Freaky!!! BTW I've felt like I needed you number on speed dial for the past week.

CraftyHope said...

Oh Jules, I'm so sorry!! How many times can one person write "lol" without actually being joking anymore? It's a little scary. I know you'll find just what you need, in time. It comes when you LEAST expect it.

Goodbye said...

Oh boy! I've got a few winners too - I literally rejected one guy like 3 times over, then he picked a fight with me!

Single said...

HILARIOUS! We should use "Rob" as a case study. Truthfully, I'm most interested in the one finger comment... did he lose all the other ones somewhere? and when he said graveyard, why did I flash to the Haunted Mansion ride at Walt Disney World?

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

I totally feel your pain - I had the cheap date from hell that lasted a whole hour this past weekend. Eharmony is becoming a waste of time and it is so slow.

the peeping window thing is creepy.

HereWeGoAJen said...

Gah. I hated dating. I found it to be the worst thing ever and I only did it in high school. I am so glad that I didn't have to do online dating.

Erica said...

Ha--I met my now-husband online in 2003 and one of the first things I thought was, "At least I know he can construct a sentence correctly." VERY important.