Being a working mom is hard because I know what I am doing is helping provide a good life for my child but it doesn't take away the guilt I feel on those mornings when I leave him crying in someone else's arms (Chris's, his teachers) because he just wants me to stay. (This doesn't happen often but when it does, I feel terrible.) I also wouldn't question the decision of someone who decides to stay home. I know their job is just as hard because they do spend so much time with their children often with few breaks while trying to maintain a household and keep it functioning. Neither job is easy which is why I think someone in the opposite situation needs to be careful before making statements that could be deemed as a judgement from someone on the other side.
I learned something out of all of this. I can only be the best mom I can be and it isn't for someone else to determine what that looks like. I can't allow someone else to question my parenting or my decisions because they are not living my life and what works for them may not work for me. I know I will never be the mom that bakes cakes for birthdays or makes homemade valentine's or volunteers weekly at my kid's school. That just isn't who I am. I wouldn't do that if I stayed home. I look at pins on Pinterest of school lunches done up in cutesy ways and fun shapes and all I think is, "I don't have time for that nor would my kids want that." Frequently I think I am screwing everything up because Jackson is a toddler and some days are hard and I feel like I have no control over him. And maybe I am but then he will give me a hug and a kiss and say, "I wuv you, Mommy" and I know that everything is OK. All that really matters is that he is happy and healthy and thriving and if I accomplish those things, then I have been successful in my job.