Just Say Julie

Why is it that there are some people in your life who never leave when you want them to and some that never stay? A certain person from my past has reappeared after months of no contact. I finally thought I was rid of him without having to give him the Go to Hell speech I had prepared. But no, Saturday night while I was enjoying Alabama's win over South Carolina that name popped up on a text message. All I wanted to say was what do you want and why won't you leave me alone. Instead I agreed to a drink on Tuesday night. I don't know why. I don't having any feelings for this guy anymore. I think it has to do with the loneliness and lack of romantic interest in recent months. The thing is this guy is bad for me for so many reasons and I have no desire to go back there. He makes me feel so worthless and bad about myself and I have been through this same song and dance with him too many times before. Why would I consider going back for more? The truth is that I a...

In the Harry Potter movies, Harry has a cloak that belonged to his father that allows him to be invisible. At some point in time in my marriage, I think I unintentionally donned an invisibility cloak. I believe I did certain things to make my husband notice me only to still feel ignored. This is an issue I continue to struggle with in my (nonexistent) dating. The crazy thing is I only realized it recently. I knew that one of the issues with my ex was the lack of attention I felt I was getting from him. What I didn't realize is that I am still starving for that attention. I had thought about it a lot but I hadn't really faced it dead on until a couple of weeks ago when I poured my heart out to my hairdresser. (How is it we can talk to people we barely know about things like this but not to our closest friends?) I haven't been on a date in a year and I know the reason is because I can't take anymore disappointment in that area my life. I use the excuse that I am...

There are a lot of changes going on in Maverickville. First of I got a new job. Now before you get all excited let me tell you that I am only marginally happy with said new job. Shortly after turning in my notice at my old job, I had one of those pit of the stomach feelings of dread about making the change. I am not one who ignores these types of feelings so I promptly spoke with my boss only to find out that I was doing my company a favor by leaving because upcoming money issues could potentially mean a layoff. So there I was stuck with the decision I had made to take a job that I questioned even taking in the first place. While I realize I should be grateful these days that I was given an opportunity to move to a new position, I am very overwhelmed and concerned after my first week that my premonition was correct. We shall see how this turns out but so far I am not liking it. Secondly, I start back to school next week. I have mentioned before my quest to become a CPA and I ha...

I have spent most of my life thinking I was a pretty open person. I have even been told that I am "an open book." But something happened recently that made me realize that I am not as open as I once was. I was at a party for the 4th of July with a friend from work and her boyfriend when I noticed one of the guys at the party. I thought he was attractive, and was hoping there would be a chance for some interest there. And that's when the crazy thing happened. As soon as the guy started to flirt with me, I shut down. I didn't want anything to do with him anymore. I made my friend take me home. The next day I tried to figure out what made me react that way. It didn't have anything to do with Mr. Past who still hasn't made an effort to contact me. That I am over and only want to talk to him to have the opportunity to tell him so. It was all about me and my fear of getting close and getting hurt again. I also realized I had been doing this for months. ...

I have been thinking a lot recently about what I want out of a relationship. This train of thought started a couple of months ago when someone from my past reappeared in my life with promises of a future. I began to question whether or not I wanted that person back in my life. The main question I could not (and still can't) answer was whether or not that person could be and do the things I want in a relationship. I started to realize that the only way to truly know the answer to that question was to figure out what exactly I am looking for. So here, dear readers, is a list of my criteria for achieving the ideal relationship: 1. Mostly importantly the person needs to be emotionally ready and opened to the idea of a relationship. That means no recent or pending divorces or breakups. 2. The person needs to be willing to provide me with an adequate amount of attention. This could include phone calls, text messages, emails, instant messages or even Facebook posts. Anythi...

After several crazy weeks of proposals at work, I was finally able to make my escape from the office and from Austin to head to the beach for a couple of days. Jenny and I left Friday morning for Port Aransas after I dropped Maverick off at Doggy Day Out for the weekend. Four hours later, we were sitting in Virginia's by the Bay eating fresh seafood and looking out over the water. That night we took a stroll on the beach and then relaxed in the condo until bedtime. After sleeping in Saturday morning, we loaded up our stuff and head to the beach from some fun in the sun. Here is my view from Saturday morning: So we enjoyed the sun, sand and water for a couple of hours before I realized that I was turning pink and it was time to head in. More relaxing in the condo and another late afternoon walk on the beach rounded out the day. Sunday morning meant checking out of the condo to head back home. At that point the last thing I wanted to do was drive back to Austin, so we decided...

I hope everyone is enjoying the new look of Just Say Julie. If you would like a cute and fun background, you should check out The Cutest Blog on the Block . They have tons of cute, free layouts that work perfectly with blogger. I had a hard time chosing one and I suspect I will change them out to spice things up a bit.