Some Things Just Never Die

Why is it that there are some people in your life who never leave when you want them to and some that never stay? A certain person from my past has reappeared after months of no contact. I finally thought I was rid of him without having to give him the Go to Hell speech I had prepared. But no, Saturday night while I was enjoying Alabama's win over South Carolina that name popped up on a text message. All I wanted to say was what do you want and why won't you leave me alone. Instead I agreed to a drink on Tuesday night. I don't know why. I don't having any feelings for this guy anymore. I think it has to do with the loneliness and lack of romantic interest in recent months. The thing is this guy is bad for me for so many reasons and I have no desire to go back there. He makes me feel so worthless and bad about myself and I have been through this same song and dance with him too many times before. Why would I consider going back for more? The truth is that I am not. I feel sorry for him. I used to be fascinated by him and the lifestyle he led but then I realized he is really just a bitter, unhappy person and it is not my job to try to make him happy. So I will have a drink on Tuesday night (that is if he actually calls to finalize plans) and I will ask him why he wanted to see me and tell him thanks but no thanks. I have moved on. I am not the same person I was when he met me a year ago and for that reason I know there is nothing between us. We want different things and it is time for him to move on as well. Now let's just hope that I have to courage and strength to actually do what I know is the right thing for me for a change.